June 2008

Happy Father’s Day! To all the fathers, I hope you will have a relaxing day with your family, enjoying each other’s company. Yes, relax and enjoy. I know, most of our wives think that we are already too relaxed anyway, so we don’t need a special day to relax. They may be right, but for the most part and contrary to what women think, we, men, are more intense, not necessarily work harder than women. For that, I decided on writing something “light” this month, so just relax and enjoy a few good, clean jokes.

I received a joke that was sent to me some times ago, but I can’t remember all the details. It must have something to do with my age, and of course, the make-up of a man’s brain—easy to forget and having selective memory. You see, we always forget what our wives tell us to do, like taking out the garbage, and those unnecessary works. Anyway, the joke goes something this: One time, a man went to a mental institute wanting to learn how it operates. While he was visiting, he realized that there were different wards for different types of patients. He asked the director how the institute determines which ward a patient belongs to. The director replied: “We have a very simple test to determine the severity level of the mental capacity of each patient. We will bring a patient before a bathtub that is filled with water. We give a teaspoon, a bowl, and a bucket to the patient, and ask the patient to remove the water as fast as he can. Which apparatus the patient uses will determine his mental capacity, and in turn determines which ward to place him.” At this point, the director turned to the man and asked, “By the way, which apparatus will you use?” The man replied, “That’s a no-brainer! Of course I will use the bucket.” To that, the director said, “Maybe I need to keep you here for observation.” “Why?” The man asked. “Normal people simply unplug the stopper!”

Here is a marriage joke. Now, it’s just a joke, so don’t take it too seriously. A man who had been married for ten years was consulting a marriage counselor. “When I was first married, I was very happy. I’d come home from a hard day down at the shop, and my little dog would race around barking, and my wife would bring my slippers. Now everything’s changed. When I come home, my dog brings my slippers, and my wife barks at me.” “I don’t know what you’re complaining about,” said the counselor. “You’re still getting the same service.”

Here is another joke: A businessman happened to be staying in a hotel where a group of ministers was holding a conference. The next morning was very cold and as the businessman approached the dining room, he noticed the ministers gathered around a blazing log fire in the dining area. He was freezing and tried to get close to the fire but the ministers blocked the way. The businessman sat for a few minutes shivering in the cold. Suddenly he shouted, “Last night I dreamed I was in hell.” “Really?” said one of the ministers. “What was it like?” The businessman replied, “Not much different than right here. I couldn’t get near the fire, for all the ministers were in the way.”

As I said it last month, “A cheerful heart is good medicine.” A cheerful heart involves thought process, feelings and behaviors. Someone has said that “Humor is the shortest distance between two people.” Therefore, laugh is good. It is the best remedy in a world of stress. So, take time to laugh with someone, but not at someone. It is extremely beneficial to relax if you can laugh loudly three times a day.

Before I sign off, I encourage all the fathers to lead their families into spiritual worship to God at home, and also bring humor into the families. There is nothing more therapeutic than having the whole family laughing together.

Pastor Larry

父 親節快樂！我希望每一個作父親的都可以與家人一起鬆弛一天，享受家庭之樂；真的去鬆弛地享受。我知大多數的太太們都認為我們已經夠鬆弛了，所以不必要有一 特別的日子來享受。她們可能是對的，但大致來說，是與女士們的思想不同，我們男人雖然未必比女人勤力，但通常來說都是比較勞力的。因此，我決定在這期的通 訊寫些「輕鬆」的題材可讓大家享受一些「清潔」的笑料。

前 些時候我從電郵中收到一則笑話，但我卻忘記全部的細節。我想這一定是與我的年紀有關，當然亦與男人的腦袋的構造有關—很善忘及有選擇性的記憶。我們都很多 時忘記太太吩咐我們需要做的事情，例如倒垃圾及那些多餘的工作。好了，笑話大概是這樣：有一個人去參觀一所精神病院要明白它的運作。當他在參觀當中，他發 覺不同情度的精神病人被安置在不同的病房。他就問主管病院的人怎樣去決定病人的精神狀況而按程度編排病房。主管回答說：「我們有一個很簡單的測定法來判斷 病人精神病的深淺程度。我們帶病人到一個裝滿水的浴缸前，給他一茶匙、一個碗、一個桶，叫他盡快的將水從缸中拿掉。病人用什麼器具就斷定他精神病的嚴重 性，就按病情安排病房。」在那個時候，主管就轉向這人，問他說：「那你會怎辦？」這人就回答：「這麼簡單，我想都不用想！我一定是用水桶啦！」聽到這個回 答，主管就對這個人說：「可能我要留你在這裡觀察一兩天。」「為什麼？」那人驚奇的問。「正常人一定會抽起浴缸的塞子放水的！」

下 面是一則結婚後的笑話。這祗是笑話，不要太認真。一個結了婚十年的丈夫去找婚姻輔導。他對輔導員說：「當我初婚的時候，我很開心。因為當我整天在外辛勞工 作後回家的時候，我的小狗一定轉來轉去向我吠，而太太一定拿我的拖鞋給我穿。現在什麼都改變了。當我工作回家的時候，我的狗拿拖鞋給我，而太太卻是不停的 對著我吠。」那輔導員回答：「我不明白你為什麼還埋怨，你仍是得到雙料的服務。」

最 後一個笑話。有一個商人在工幹的時候住在一間旅館中，適逢同時間有一大群牧師因為會議的原故亦住在那裡。第二日的早晨天氣非常寒冷。當他踏入飯廳前的休息 室的時候，發覺很多牧師在火爐前面取暖。他實在是冷到發抖，希望能接近火爐一點。怎知那些牧師卻不容讓他。這商人發抖了幾分鍾後，忽然就大聲說：「昨天晚 上我發夢入了地獄。」「真的嗎？」有一牧師轉頭問他，「地獄是怎麼樣的？」那個商人就回答：「與現在的境況沒有不同。因為很多牧師在我前面阻礙著，令我不 能接近它的火。」

正如我在上月所說，「喜樂的心乃是良藥」。一粿喜樂的心是包括我們的思想，感覺及行為。有人曾經這樣說：「幽默是可以將兩人之間的距離拉近。」所以笑是有益的；是在這充滿壓力的世界中最妙的仙丹。與別人一起笑吧，但不要以別人為笑柄。如果你可以每日大笑三場，這真的可以幫助你去鬆弛下來。

收筆之前，我鼓勵作父親的去領導你的家人在家中以靈來敬拜神，亦帶些幽默感在家中。如果整個家庭都能以歡笑渡日的話，這就是最有效的治療身、心的方法。

唐若愚牧師